my zoe:)

we are going thru a rough patch with miss zoe.

but this morning i decided to check on what she has been writing on the computer and i found this.

Spoons' Musical Life

The Wedding Stringer

Transcribed by Zoe Macias

Act One

(Opening Shot: 

String: (narrating) Ever had one of those days when you just forgot about your old crush? Well, I was about to, in a big way.

String: (gasping) Roxanne!

Spoons: Who's Roxanne?

String: You know, Roxanne Richardson, my arch nemesis. That girl with the superhero alter ego, known as SafetyQueen.

Spoons: Oh, that Roxanne.

String: I thought so. (He turns off the music.) And the other one, like Roxanne's, it's usually a favorite band of an idiot.

(Cut to String walking down the apartment building hall.

Roxanne: (from O. C.) Okay! I'm ready!

(String looks O. C.; he gasps in shock and drops his yo-yo. Cut to a pair of feet, wearing green boots. We pan up to show . We stop to Roxanne's head. She is wearing a pink mask and a blonde wig.)

String: Roxanne. She's h–

(Some hearts, stars and planets appear around his head, and move around it in a circle.)

String: She's h–

(The hearts, stars and planets disappear. He melts O. C. on the ground. Cut to him, as a puddle. Spoons, Arthur and Pie Plate are standing on him.)

String: She's wow!

String: I must've died and gone to heaven

'Cause it was a quarter past eleven

On a Saturday in 1999

Pie Plate: Ow! My skull!

(Some more flat stones fly pass the screen.)

String: (from O. C.) Incoming!

(The stones head towards and hit the four kids. They yell in pain.)

Arthur: Look out!

Pie Plate: Cover your head!

Roxanne: Yeah, what happened?

Arthur: (pointing O. C.) I think I already know the answer!

Roxanne: (gasping) Old Man Squidward! (She turns on the light switch.)

Squidward: Hello, Roxanne. You don't realize it yet, but your little dream of being a cosmic girl is about to disappear.

(Roxanne puts on her glasses and jumps out of bed. She says this line while she walks to Squidward and while the camera follows her.)

Roxanne: What're you talking about?

(At the end of this line, she crosses her arms.)

Squidward: I'm gonna kidnap you in my closet, and erase your boyfriend's stupid "Cosmic Girl" video from the Musical Network's Love Song Special!

Roxanne: What?! You better not! (She runs O. C..) String!

(Cut to the inside of String's room. He is sleeping. Pan to the door; Roxanne slams it open.)

Roxanne: WAKE UP!

(Cut to String, still sleeping

Act Three

String: Hey! I finally got a text message from Roxanne!

(He looks at the screen of his phone. He starts reading the message.)

String: "H-S exclamation point, I-R exclamation point, B-N colon, B-O-Y-B-C-F-J-G-C comma, O-M-S-H-M-H-P-I-H-H exclamation point, sad face." Okay, I don't understand a word Roxanne is saying.

Arthur: I do! I speak text. (He looks at String's cell phone.) This message says, "Hi String! It's Roxanne! Bad news: Because of your beautiful cover for Jamiroquai's "Cosmic Girl", Old Man Squidward has me held prisoner in his house!"

String: Old Man Squidward. I should've guessed. (His phone beeps again.) Oh, she gave me another message. (He looks at the phone.) "G-Y-P-T-Y-S-B"?

Arthur: That means, "Give your phone to your stepbrother".

String: Okay. (He does so.)

Arthur: (gasping) String! Old Man Squidward's tryna cancel our "Cosmic Girl" music video!

Fondue: (on megaphone, pointing O. C.) Hit it!

(Cut to a comic book, that says "Spoons and the United We Stand Band presents Cosmic Girl". on a yellow background. Jamiroquai's "Cosmic Girl" plays. On the cover is String and Roxanne holding hands and floating in outer space. A pink, glittery light flies around from O. C.. The comic book opens. Zoom-in slowly to the first picture. It shows the band on a purple background, all covered in black. The light flies past them. The music starts as the lights turn on. Some colored circles on the ground glow. Spoons has on a green wig, a Spy vs. Spy T-shirt, blue shorts, a green short-sleeved coat and green boots, playing a pink Flying V guitar. Arthur is dressed in a blue classical uniform, playing a red left-handed keytar with orange keys. Pie Plate is wearing an orange wig, white star-shaped sunglasses and a light green dress, playing a purple drum set. And String is wearing a Jamiroquai hat, a bright blue coat, a white T-shirt with a bright green Jamiroquai Buffalo Man on it, bright blue shorts and white, blue and green sneakers. He starts singing on a microphone.)

String: I must've died and gone to heaven

'Cause it was a quarter past eleven

(Cut to a calendar with the year 1999 on it; String walks to it from O. C..)

On a Saturday in 1999.

(Extreme close-up of Spoons' hand on the guitar. Cut to String, still singing on the microphone. Arthur is playing the keytar behind him. The pink light flies past both boys. They look at it flying with a surprised look.)

String: Right across at where I'm standin'

On that dance floor, she was landin'.

(The pink light crashes on the floor at the end of this line, and Roxanne appears inside of the light, crashing in the floor.)

String: (from O. C.) It was clear that she was from another time.

(At the end of this line, cut to Spoons, Arthur and Pie Plate, in a surprised look. Pie Plate's jaw falls on the crash cymbal of her drum set. Pan to another comic picture: Close-up of String on a yellow background, shrugging and holding an umbrella.)

String: Like some Baby Barbarella

(freestyle) With the stars as her umbrella....

(At the end of this line, he opens the umbrella, and it shows lots of stars on it. Still holding the umbrella with his right hand, he shrugs with his left hand, and sings again.)

String: She asked me if I'd like to magnetize.

(Pan to Roxanne, next to String. He holds the umbrella with his left hand.)

String: Do I have to go star-trekkin'?

'Cause it's you I should be checkin'.

(He drops the umbrella as Roxanne zaps him with green lasers coming out of her eyes. String sings in the background.)

So she laser-beamed me with her cosmic eyes.

(She stops zapping him; String has been char-boiled. He faints.)

Oh, now.

(Pan to another comic picture of the whole band; String is no longer char-boiled.)

Band: She's just a cosmic girl–

Pie Plate: Oh, yeah.

Band: –from another galaxy.

(String's heart shows up in his chest; It flies by itself and carries him.)

My heart's at zero gravity.

(He gets back on the ground, and bends his knees.)

She's from a cosmic world–

Pie Plate: Wah, wah, wah, wah.

Band: –puttin' me in ecstasy

String: Ooh!

Band: And transmittin' on my frequency.

Pie Plate: Wah, wah, wah, wah.

Arthur, Pie Plate: (freestyle) She's cosmic!

(Close-up of Arthur playing the keytar in a theremin tone. Close-up of Spoons playing the guitar. Extreme close-up of Arthur's fingers on the keytar in the theremin tone. Cut to Pie Plate's foot stepping on the pedal to bang the bass drum three times. Cut to her crash cymbal; she uses her drumstick to crash it four times. Pan to another comic picture that takes place outside. String watches the night sky. Cut to Roxanne using a laptop.)

Roxanne: I'm scannin' all my radars.

String: Well, she said she's from a quasar

Forty thousand million light years away.

(He raises his hand way up during this line. Extreme close-up of Spoons waving her green hair back and forth. Back to String, shrugging.)

It's a distant solar system.

(He grabs his blue cell phone from his pocket, and opens it.)

I tried to phone, but they don't list 'em,

So, I asked her for a number all the same.

(At the end of this line, he closes his phone and pan to Roxanne. She puts her finger up and walks O. C.. She comes back with a gray disc. She puts it on the ground.)

String: She said....

Roxanne: (freestyle) Step in my transporter

So I can teleport you

(She spreads her arms around her body and sings.)

All around my heavenly body.

(Close-up of String, blushing.)

String: Oh, this could be a close encounter.

I should take care not to flounder.

(The band walks to him from O. C..)

Band: Sends me into hyperspace, when I see her pretty face.

(Pan to another comic picture of the band, back in the dance room.)

She's just a cosmic girl

From another galaxy.

(String's heart shows up in his chest again, carrying him while flying.)

My heart's at zero gravity.

(He falls and bends his knees again.)

She's from a cosmic world–

Pie Plate: Wah, wah, wah, wah.

Band: –puttin' me in ecstasy.

And transmittin' on my frequency.

Pie Plate: Wah, wah, wah, wah.

Spoons, String: (freestyle) She's cosmic!

String:  Ooh! Ooh, ooh!

(Pan to another comic picture with Spoons on a black background.)

Band: Sends me into hyperspace, when I see her pretty face.

(Arthur zips from O. C. next to her.)

Sends me into hyperspace, when I see her pretty face.

(Close-up of Pie Plate playing her drums.)

Sends me into hyperspace, when I see her pretty face.

(Spoons and Arthur zip next to her from O. C.; Arthur on the left, and Spoons on the right.)

Sends me into hyperspace–

(String shows up from below O. C..)

String: –When I see her pretty face.

(He gets back down O. C., pan to another comic picture, with the band playing on the purple background. Spoons and Pie Plate are vocalizing while String sings the rest.)

String: She's just a cosmic girl

From another galaxy

Transmittin' on her frequency.

Yeah, cosmic, oh.

(Pan to cosmic Roxanne next to him.)

Can't you be my cosmic woman?

I need you, I want you

To be my cosmic girl for the rest of time.

(She shakes her head yes. He holds hands with her. While String says this line, cut to her belt; a rocket boosters come out of it. Some pink clouds appear below the couple as they fly above O. C., and they stop to the stars and planets in outer space, floating; the pink clouds below them disappear. They kiss each other as a heart appears behind them.)

String: Oh!

I'm losin' my mind

On that cosmic girl, yeah!

(Dissolve to show this scene as a regular comic book picture. "THE END!" is right below the picture. Zoom-out to show the pages of the book. It closes. A blue rocket flies around the screen from O. C., and stops in front of it. Inside is String still holding hands with cosmic Roxanne. He winks, and starts kissing her. The rocket flies O. C..)

Fondue: But, Spoons, how do you know the actual Jamiroquai could free Roxanne from Old Man Squidward's closet?

this is quintessential Zoe.

all the way, super distilled essence of my uber smart, asperger's kid.
bits and pieces of her favorite cartoons mashed up together with the things that go on in her brain.

i love you Zoe Zorro:))